Here to help, kinda.

Good grief, I’ve had a few hectic days. The last time I posted, I was giddy as a loon about getting my laptop back from Dell.

Well, let’s just say, that never happened, at least, not on that day. That’s right, it’s ranting time!

Oh boy, if you’ve ever contacted customer services for anything, then I’m guessing you have at least one horror story. Over the past week, we’ve managed to collect a few. The incompetence of some of these places astounds me. I had been waiting patiently for the return of Marlowe for about a week, without hearing anything from Dell’s customer services to say when it would be coming back. So, I decided to give them a call to find out how it was going. I waited on hold patiently for the good space of 20 minutes, and when my call was finally answered. I was asked for my service tag.

“Oh, where can I find that?”

“The service tag is found on the back of the laptop”

“But the laptop is in for repair.”

“Ok, can I have your customer number then, that’s found on any of the invoices.”

“Can we do it by my address? As I don’t have an invoice in front of me.”

“Can you get an invoice?”

“Yes, but it will take a minute or two.”

“Then call back with it, thank you, goodbye”

And with that, he hung up. I kid you not, he just hung up on me, leaving me slightly gobsmacked about the further 20 minutes I would have to wait because he couldn’t be bothered to wait a single minute.

So, I grabbed an invoice, and waited until I finally got through to another advisor.

“Can I please have your service tag.”

“Oh, I don’t have one at the moment, as it’s on the back of my laptop that’s currently in for repairs. I have my customer number though”

“Yes, I’ll take that then.”

*Reads out the customer number*

“So, how can I help?”

“I’d just like to know when my laptop would be returning.”

“I cannot give you that information without your service tag”

“But, that’s on the back of the laptop, if I had known I needed it, I would have wrote it down.”

“I’m sorry, but it’s not late yet, is it?”

“Well no, but I would like to know what day it’s returning.”

“It’s not late, so it’s not a problem, anything else I can help you with?”

“I find it hard to believe that you can’t find out when it would be returning to me, surely you have some sort of status report for it?”

“Is there anything else I can help you with?”

“You haven’t helped me with this, so no.”

“Thank you.”

And with that, he also hung up.

I wish I could have said that was the end of this whole ordeal, but no. It continued. As I returned home that same evening to find one of those horrible cards slipped through our door. You know the one I mean, “I’m sorry, we came to call, but no one was home”. That one! Needless to say, I wasn’t too happy, or in the most cheery of moods about this, so I gave the couriers a quick ring to find out when I could get it redelivered.

To which, I was answered with, “I’m sorry, we can’t send this out again without Dell’s permission, as we have already tried to make two deliveries.”

Right, I normally have a very good temper, an excellent one even. I don’t normally shout, I don’t get too angry about little things. After an evening of wipes in WoW, I still have a pretty level head. But (and yes, here comes the big old “but”), I hit the roof with them. At least, I would have, had Mouse not snatched the phone away from my hands before I could unleash the gates of hell at them. She explained the whole story to them, and got them to agree to a delivery for the following day. Like the little trooper she is.

That following day, we both waited in patiently, and at 12.30, we received a phone call, confirming that the laptop would arrive before 5.30 that evening. So, 5pm rolls by, and I’m starting to get a bit concerned, so I pop a quick phone call to see how it was going. And this is kinda how the conversation went:

“Hi, I’m just making sure there are no problems with the delivery.”

“We attempted the delivery today, and no one was in.”

“Well, that’s nonsense; we have been in all day.” And we had, we daren’t leave the room near the door or put any radios on, for fear of not hearing the driver.

“Well, the driver arrived at 12.35, and no one was...” there was a slight hesitation in her voice while stating this. “... we rang you today at 12.30, so we know you were in. Hang on, let me speak to the driver and their depot.”

So, we were stuck on hold for a little bit, after which we were informed, “Ok, I’ve just been in contact with them, and they are still claiming that they arrived, but it’s absolute garbage if you ask me. Unfortunately, there’s not a lot I can do about this today, I’ve tried every option, but the best they can do is get it to you before 12pm tomorrow morning.”

Reluctantly I agreed, feeling rather frustrated about the whole ordeal, but FINALLY, good old Marlowe returned to us. Welcome back home! (Even if they didn’t replace your battery and give you a quick format like they said they would.)

But yes, bloody customer service! But, at least I got that out of my system, now to make an equally irritated WoW post.